


The Good, the Bad, and the Dirty

by gaymumbling



Series: Death of a Bachelor [5]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M, Phan - Freeform, Smut, Songfic, dan is a kinky little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-31
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-07-11 06:58:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7034647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaymumbling/pseuds/gaymumbling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Dan sleeps with everyone, but finds Phil and falls in love.</p>
<p>Or, in which Dan and Phil have sex for no good reason, as with most of the other fics on this site.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Good, the Bad, and the Dirty

Dan knew full well that good girls don’t always act so good. He’s had countless one night stands with good girls who, once they hit the bed, turned so dirty Dan almost couldn’t believe it. But you know, that’s how he likes it.

The first time Dan considered hooking up with a guy was in his first (and last) year of uni. He called his friend into his room to work on a project - the friend was out to everyone as gay - and things escalated. First it was a little kiss, and then another, and then a longer kiss, and before either of them knew it Dan was laying on the bed and holy shit that feels good, do it again, and again...

Wow.

A whole other door was opened to Dan that night, and it lead to a long winding hallway full of more doors that lead to countless different bedrooms, each having one thing in common: Dan gave more and more of himself to a different man in each one. Everyone knew that he slept around but he didn’t care because damn it, it made him feel good, and no one was getting hurt. It was always mutual that nothing would come out of the one night stands.

Let’s be honest: Dan learned early on that he liked it rough: bite marks, hickeys, scratches, he welcomed it all. This was made clear early on as well. Anyone who wanted a night to remember somehow found their way into Dan’s room, be it at uni or in the apartment he rented after dropping out. This included Phil, who was more than a one night stand. The two men got together more times than Dan would have liked to admit - he was a strict one time guy.

By far, Phil was Dan’s favorite, mostly because it took so long for him to change from the happy man he met at the coffee house to the rough fuckbuddy he brought to his bedroom. He loved the feeling of letting someone set themself free, because he liked the element of trust it introduced to the relationship, even if it was only meant to last one night.

+++

Dan also loved seducing people. He had it whittled down into practically an art form: swoop in, lay down the charm, and let the universe do the rest. He somehow got on very good terms with the universe, exhibited by the sheer number of people who accepted his invitations to bed. This was no different when he approached Phil, the cute guy sitting in the corner booth of the coffeeshop down the road. Dan had his heart set on getting this guy into bed with him, and wasted no time commenting on how the raindrops on the window look so absolutely magical next to such a beautiful face, and how would you feel about joining me to my apartment?

Dan extended a hand and offered a wink, and Phil was somewhat hesitant to accept either one, but soon enough they were strolling through the streets of London in the rain, hand in hand. Dan’s hair began to stick out in a curly heap because of the moisture, but Phil was too busy internally freaking out to notice because wow, what a beautiful man, and he thinks  _ I’m _ beautiful, and oh my god we’re going to his apartment--

His thoughts were cut off by Dan pulling his arm to signal that they had arrived at the apartment. Dan unlocked the door, pulled Phil inside, and within a moment he had him pressed against the door. Dan murmured a low “may I?” in Phil’s ear, and Phil whispered a quiet but confident “yes” and then their lips were connected and their hips and chests practically became one, they were so close. Phil’s hands found their way into Dan’s slightly damp and curly hair and tangled into the locks, moving closer to the roots with each movement of Dan’s head. Soon he was just about pulling Dan’s hair, which rewarded Phil with quite a moan and a deeper kiss. The two began a kind of messy waltz through the apartment, starting with Dan leading Phil in the direction of the bedroom. Halfway through the living room area, Phil lifted Dan up, at which point he wrapped his legs around Phil’s midsection. At that moment, Dan knew he picked the right guy to bring to his house: as much as Dan liked doing the fucking, he wanted to be the one not walking tomorrow.

Phil carried Dan through the open door to his bedroom, and gently set him down on the neatly made bed. Phil whispered something about being honored to be the one to mess up such a lovely job, and Dan started on the button of his pants with a smirk. After he got his own pants undone, he moved on to Phil’s, making sure to toy with him by brushing his hands over his dick. Phil let out a moan as Dan unzipped his jeans, and let him take them off the rest of the way along with his boxers, while Dan began unbuttoning Phil’s shirt. When he got it off, he took a moment to marvel at the paleness of his skin, and the way it rose and dipped over his muscles, and the undulation of his chest caused by his already heavy breath. He leaned in for a kiss before taking his own shirt over his head, and tossing it toward the door. Phil leaned in this time, initiating yet another kiss, but this time lowering Dan onto his back and ending up on top of him. He moved away from his lips and down to his jaw, leaving kisses and little red marks all the way from his jaw to his chest, stopping for a moment to help Dan out of his underwear. Through ragged breaths, Dan instructed Phil on where to find the lube. Phil put some on his fingers and prepared to stretch the other man, but Dan stopped him, saying “oh, no, babe; I’m always ready.”

Phil began, trying his hardest to not get too attached to Dan and his bedroom, because he made it clear on the walk home: one night, and one night only. But god, he was so attractive and he was such a responsive partner. You could say anything and Dan would respond, which Phil took full advantage of. Over the course of their hookup, Phil got him to shout his name, and call him daddy, and oh god that was his new favorite thing. He immediately loved Dan’s voice at that moment, as rough as the sex they were having, shouting his name desperately. 

He loved it even more when Dan made it known that he was about to orgasm - the way he said it sent Phil over the edge as well, and the older man collapsed on the left side of the bed. They lay there for a few moments, and Phil went over to get Dan’s discarded boxers to clean off their chests. Phil crawled back over to Dan, and they slept there the whole night.

+++

Dan woke first the next morning, and couldn’t believe he broke his only rule: only sex, and that meant no sleep overs. He didn’t want to be rude and just kick Phil out of his apartment, plus he looked absolutely adorable sleeping in Dan’s bed.

He tore his eyes away from the sleeping man, not allowing himself to get more attached to him than he already was, and decided to wait until he woke up and offer to drive him to his house.

+++

When Dan got back to his house after the agonizingly long and Phil-less drive home, he set to getting ready for his afternoon shift. He’s not normally one to kiss and tell, but he just couldn’t help oversharing the previous night’s experiences to his closest work friends over drinks after they let out for the night. He tried his best to ignore their attempts at getting him to go back to Phil, until one of them pointed at his arm. “What’s that?” he asked, as Dan looked down and saw a number written on his arm. “I think I may know what it is,” Dan said, “but I have no idea how it got there.”

+++

As soon as Dan got home, he texted the number scrawled on this forearm. Sure enough, it was Phil, who was presumably very glad he texted. Dan liked to think he was pacing back and forth all afternoon, waiting for a text from him. All throughout their conversation, Dan was dropping hints that he wanted to get together again, but each time Phil either ignored them completely or didn’t get the hint. This was getting pathetic. Finally, Dan cut right to the chase:

_ to: Phil (10:38 pm) _

i want to keep getting underneath you

_ to: Phil (10:38 pm) _

and all my friends want us to fall in love

**Author's Note:**

> phew, you made it, congrats. i hope you enjoyed my smut-without-real-smut aka what happens when a teenage lesbian virgin tries to write gay sex. anyway.
> 
> the next in this series will be up... eventually. i dont have it written but i mean its been a while since i uploaded anything. maybe this will inspire me to write?
> 
> as always, comments and kudos make my lil heart sing, and you can find me on tumblr as joe-tro.tumblr.com. catch ya on the flip side, yall.


End file.
